I Must Have Been Looking At Something

She was sleeping when she wasn't at school, and I was working, working, working.

As the days dragged on, I knew that the physical distance between us was slowly becoming an emotional one as well. I don't know why I let it happen, I don't know why she let it happen. I'm sure she thought I was fixated on other things. I mean, I must have been looking at something, right?

Being the fool that I was, I let go, and we began to fall, further and further.

It was pitch black all around, yet I knew she was somewhere nearby, I could feel it! After all, I had been holding her hand just a second ago. Though the fear of hitting the ground was pulsing through my body, and clouding my thoughts, I was able to work up enough strength to reach out with my arms, in hopes of grabbing on to something, to someone.

And still, I fell, and fell, and fell.

I tried to look through the darkness, to find some sign of her. I would have grabbed on to anything! But the idea that she was still out there, reaching out as I was, gave me some hope.

But still, I fell, and fell, and fell.

Until finally, I crashed into the nothing of a floor...
and it hurt.

I waited, I waited to hear her slam against the floor as well, but I heard nothing. It was then that I knew she had found a hand to hold on to. It was then that I knew I'd lost her.

Oh but if only she'd of know that I wasn't looking at anything.
Oh but if only she'd of know that I was only looking at her.
Oh but if only she'd of know that I was always looking at her.
If only she'd of know.

(Untitled One)

I sped down that interstate, the wind from outside making my wet cheeks even colder. I stared out at the town I called home, it was asleep now, but I was awake. The stars played connect the dots and spelled out all the words I didn't say in the space between the power lines.

My Eyes

I'm falling, but I'm upside down, so it looks like I'm flying upward.
But there's no infinity when I get up there.
There's only dirt and mud.

Time flies past me.
Days are more like hours and months pass by like weeks.
At this rate I'll die before it's even time for winter, my most favorite season.

If only I hadn't closed my eyes
If only I hadn't closed
If only I had my eyes
If only I closed my eyes
If I closed my eyes

Goodbye

I can't recall much of last night
All I remember are those red drapes

He can't recall much of last night
All he can remember is the leather couch and the way it smelled

I can't recall much of last night
All I can remember is the way the moon poured in the room

He can't recall much of last night
All he can remember is the way her breast felt as she breathed

I can't recall much of last night
Oh who am I kidding, I remember last night all too well

Send That Shit Out!

Send it!

Today

Today is my first day of school and I am scared.
I don't know anyone here, just Bobby, and he smells bad anyway.

Today is my first day of school and I am scared.
This building's way too tall and my legs are way too small.
There are stairs everywhere and sometimes I fear I'll fall.
It's likely to happen too! I heard it happened to some kid last year after all.

Today is my first day of school and I am scared.
I don't know anyone here, just Bobby, and he smells bad anyway.

Not Even Starry Clouds

That gap between the stars and the clouds has become much smaller.
Now I drool over the clouds in the day, and stare upward for hours gazing at the stars at night.

I love them both, I do.
But who am I to say which is better?
Who am I to say what is right?

Not even cloudy stars or starry clouds would simplify this now.
Not even starry clouds.